Love/Hate

This post is my contribution to Molly’s Pussy Pride Project.

Love/Hate

I have a lot of love/hate relationships in my life. I love my kids but sometimes hate the fact that I’m a parent with all the responsibilities it brings, I love where I live but sometimes I hate the weather, I love Sir but have sometimes told him I hate him for some of the things he’s done to me and I definitely have a real love/hate thing with pegs and nipple clamps! I’m sure a lot of people have a similar feeling. Wanting the pain but hating it too.

When it comes to my pussy I’m still in a love/hate relationship, I always have been. I love the fact it’s enabled me to have children, I love how it makes me feel when it’s touched, licked or fucked. But I hate the fact that I have one, that I’m a woman. It’s gotten a lot better as I’ve got older but as a teenager I hated being a girl. Hated having periods, hated the expectations I put on myself when it came to boys and sex. I don’t ever remember anyone actually saying to me that I had to get married and have children but I suppose it was more the message from society as a whole – girls find a boy, they get married, they keep house and they have children and like all hormonal fourteen year olds all I wanted was to know that I was attractive, that someone out there would love me. I never wanted to have children, as I got older I wanted to travel the world and take photos. Circumstances dictated otherwise. I still want to travel the world and take photos, maybe one day I’ll get to do that.

Once I discovered the pleasure I could get from my clitoris I loved that bit of me but with boys it was a different story, I was having sex for them not for me. Don’t get me wrong, I was never forced, but I rarely got anything from it. Gradually I came to enjoy sex but it was never a mind-blowing, earth-shattering experience.

I’m a natural girl, I’ve never shaved or waxed. I’ve thought about it but I think waxing would be too painful, I like pain but I think that would be the wrong sort of pain. And I’m too scared to try shaving, I cut my legs enough, not going to risk a cut there. I only shave my armpits and legs if I’m seeing someone, luckily I’m not too hairy, if I was I’d probably do it more often. But when it comes to my pussy I prefer not to and Sir and I are both happy he has something to pull.

When it comes to names I generally use pussy, I’ve come to love the word cunt, which is a word I rarely used in the past unless I was writing about sex. But I still don’t use it as a swear word if I’m talking about someone. One word I hadn’t heard in a long time until Sir used it was minge, I don’t know is it just an English word, but I’ve usually only heard English people use it. I don’t particularly like ladygarden, it’s just strange and vagina is too clinical. There are so many other words for it that I don’t like but I’m not going to list them all or I’d be here for ages.

I think overall I do love my pussy but we still have issues to sort out 🙂

I thought long and hard about actually posting a picture, which is weird. I haven’t been shy about posting photos of my other bits. But if I’m going to do this I might as well do it all. We are all different shapes and sizes, the only way to stop body shaming and unrealistic representations in the media and online is for real people to get onboard with projects like this.

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9 thoughts on “Love/Hate

  1. Coffee shops are not the worst place to read something inappropriate. I enjoyed the honesty of this post, it does point out that way that there is always some societal pressure to be a certain way and women tend to suffer it far too much compared to men.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. It’s always been the case that women are supposed to be a certain way, from looks to behaviour. The problem is that expectations are changing all the time and it’s impossible to keep up. So I don’t 😀
      There’s now more pressure on men to be a certain way too, more in the media than in society but we all want to belong, to be accepted, particularly during the teen years. Finding our place in the world is so damn hard!
      It’s become something of a specialist subject with me as I have watched my kids and their friends grow up (boys) and I’ve seen how some of them struggle with the expectations versus the reality of life.

      Liked by 1 person

      1. I have a son, I fear for the expectations he will feel pressured by. But I always tell him, different is ok and being himself is the best way. I’ve torn myself up one side and down the other over the expectations and wants of others. I’m getting past that, I hope that my son will be more his own person.

        Liked by 1 person

      2. I’ve tried to do the same. I think in a way it can be harder for boys – not allowed to be emotional etc. – but I’ve found the most important thing is making sure they have at least one responsible adult they feel comfortable talking to. I’ve told mine that I don’t care who they talk to as long as they talk to someone.
        Mine have had a couple of problems at school because they refuse to behave like sheep 😀 But that’s because I try to encourage them to be themselves and to think for themselves too.

        Liked by 1 person

      3. You raise them to think for themselves, to question authority, doesn’t help when at home you are that authority. But I have always tried to tell him not to keep stuff in, if he’s unhappy, tell someone, talk about how he feels. I was never taught these things, as a result, I am waiting for a mental health referral.

        As always, your blog is a joy

        Liked by 1 person

      4. I think the difference is as a parent you can explain your reasons, school rules aren’t explained and some teachers are just not interested in discussions.
        Good luck on your referral and thanks for reading 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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