How Many?

Food For Thought Friday #8

What’s the magic number?  This week we turn our thoughts to how much we need to share about our pasts with current partners

 Do you need or expect to know how many previous sexual encounters your current sexual partner has had? Is it any of your business?

I know the question asks about current partner, but this is how I’ve always felt.

The magic number is one of those things that pops up every now and again, I read an article about a survey carried out by a website for extra-marital dating that the majority of men and women thought 10 was the ‘Goldilocks’ number. Hmmm, yeah, whatever. Truth is there isn’t an ideal number, some people have long relationships that end and may only have had sexual encounters with a few people, others may have a different one (or more) every day. It really doesn’t bother me how many sexual encounters my partners have had, and what is a sexual encounter anyway? A quick drunken fumble? Oral? Penatrative sex? Even a look, a text or kiss can be a sexual encounter if it’s done right.

Truth is, it’s not something I expect or need to know, it’s not really any of my business unless their past encounters interfere too much with our encounter (baggage, been there a few times) Some people want to share but again there is such a thing as too much information, I don’t really want to know every tiny detail just as I don’t want to share every detail of my past encounters. And never, ever compare!

I suppose in some ways it’s nice to know how much experience someone has had in general, although quantity is certainly no guarantee of quality and there is something about the thought of having an encounter with someone with little experience, as long as they are willing to learn 😉

As for me, I am am unashamedly a slut, I haven’t sat down and counted how many, but I’d say it’s definitely more than ten but probably less than a hundred 😀

More Food For Thought Friday here



Word For Wednesday #19

My word for this week is Vocabulary. Warning – this post gets a bit crude towards the end.

From the website – First used in the 1500s to mean a list of words with explanations, the noun vocabulary came to refer to the “range of language of a person or group” about two hundred years later. A lot of hobbies, like fishing or knitting, require that you learn their unique vocabulary before you can get the most out of them.

Vocabulary – A language user’s knowledge of words, a listing of the words used in some enterprises, the system of techniques or symbols serving as a means of expression (as in arts or crafts)

I even love the sound of this word 😀

According to some people I have a very large vocabulary, I don’t know how many words I know, I can’t say I’ve ever tried to count them. But when it comes to crosswords and other word games I’m rarely lost for words.

I’ve always been a reader and I’ve always loved to learn about new things – whether it’s a creative hobby or an academic subject – and pretty much everything comes with its own new set of words to learn. Just a quick example – crochet – there is a difference between English terms and American terms – double crochet in an English pattern is single crochet in an American pattern – so when I was learning to crochet I had to learn two sets of words.

And then there’s the way words, and the way they are put together can change their meaning over time, words that are no longer used and the introduction of new words – reading a modern novel is very different to reading something from a couple of hundred years ago. More words to learn in the context of which they are used.

I love words, but right now, no matter how extensive my vocabulary, all I can think of are the short, nasty, dirty ones.

Lick, suck, fuck, slut, bite, slap, pinch, hurt, belt, spank, whore, fucktoy, yes, no, stop, Sir, please, good girl. You get the idea.

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On Being Naked

Food For Thought Friday #7

This week we would like to know how you feel about being naked…

Are you at ease being naked? Do you feel more comfortable clothed or unclothed? Can you explain why you feel this way?

This is a tricky one for me to answer. I’ve never been at ease being naked, it’s taken me a long time to accept the way I look and I’m still not all the way there. And yet when it comes to sex it’s not something I even really think about, (except with my ex – all sex was under the covers and in the dark, I didn’t want him looking at me and I always wore pyjamas when I slept. I just didn’t want him touching me at all). In my experience, and I may be being a bit sexist, most men are happy enough that you want to fuck them and they’re not focused on how you look at all. I know some have preferences for boobs, bum, whatever, but in the heat of the moment they don’t care. I’ve never had any complaints anyway 🙂 The first time you get naked with someone can be a bit scary but if things are going the way they’re supposed to, or even if they aren’t – because, let’s face it, sex can be slightly ridiculous sometimes – it becomes less of an issue, one of the reasons I prefer spontaneous over planned for a first time. Planning lets all those nasty little voices take over.

In everyday non-sexual life you’re more likely to find me in my fleecy jammies and slippers, this climate isn’t one to encourage nudity. And I have a houseful of boys so I don’t think it’s appropriate for me to be walking around naked. They’re quite happy wandering around in their boxers or a pair of shorts and I don’t see there’s anything wrong with that, I’m certainly not going to give them any lectures about covering up, young people have enough to deal with in that area. I don’t want them to be uncomfortable about their looks, shape or size and I do pull them up if they make a comment about how someone else looks. I’m trying to teach them about respecting all differences and to actually think before they open their mouths, it’s easy to hurt someone unintentionally with a thoughtless comment.

The last year has seen a change in my attitude towards myself, or photos of myself anyway. The thought of taking photographs, or having someone else taking photographs, of me – not a fucking chance! Now I’m happily looking for the next chance to take loads, it’s weird but I never see it as taking photographs of me, it’s a project, I have an idea and I go with it. Some work better than others but the more I take the easier it becomes, especially now I have a camera with a timer. I do edit my photos, but more because I’m going for a certain feeling rather than because of the way I look and I have posted a couple of unedited shots. Whatever the photo, pressing publish is always the hardest thing, but I’ve been lucky that I’ve only ever had positive comments. It can be a bit overwhelming if I think about how many people have seen my bits! And I absolutely love taking part in the different memes such as Sinful Sunday and Boobday, the support and positivity from these communities is amazing, they have done so much for my confidence and self image and I love seeing what others post too.

The one thing I still have an issue with is getting dressed in front of someone. I don’t know why this should be a problem, after all, when someone has seen everything, why should I still feel uncomfortable covering up after? Just the strange way my brain is wired I suppose.


Curl B+W


Just Me

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There’s Something About Spanking

So, it’s been a while since I’ve written a story. The words just haven’t been there. They seem to be coming back though 😀

This isn’t the best thing I’ve ever written but it’s something. (And there are photos too!)


She shivers slightly as she gets ready, partly from the cold, partly from the thrill of the feeling as she draws the stocking up her leg. The thoughts of him running through her head makes her stomach flutter. Thinking about how much he appreciates the fact that she dresses up for him, her hand shakes slightly as she applies the lipstick, it was the reddest one she could find. Sometimes she wishes she could go on a proper shopping trip, somewhere with decent shops, buy better make-up, fishnets – she’d love a pair of those, or ones with seams.

She feels herself getting wet as she slides her feet into the absurdly high heels she managed to find in town. They don’t really fit her properly but at least when she wears them she’s tall enough for him when he bends her over and fucks her from behind. She slides a hand between her legs, feels her wetness, but she knows she can’t make herself feel the way he makes her feel when he touches her. She lights a cigarette, noticing the lipstick on the filter, takes a few photographs to accompany the words she writes, wonders when he’ll see them.


Will they get him hard. She misses him, misses his hands, his mouth, his cock. What she really wants now though is for him to drag her over his knee, bare her arse and spank her, it’s been so long she can’t remember the last time. He spanks her in bed but it’s not the same, not the same as being over his knee, one hand on the back of her neck while the other strokes her arse, her thighs, between her legs. He knows she’ll be wet before the first slap lands, how much she loves it, the reddening skin, the marks he leaves. It’s hard to describe how it makes her feel, it’s so different to anything else, but it something she craves even without being able to define why.

She smiles ruefully as she stubs out the cigarette, takes off the shoes and changes back into her practical, everyday persona. Her spanking is something that’ll have to wait for another day, just like the shopping trip.


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