Progress?

Wicked Wednesday #34

 

turnaround

Prompt – This week the prompt is a song, and specifically the part of the lyrics you see in the image above.

The last few months have been rubbish, but finally the meds seem to be working (fingers crossed). The knot of anxiety I’ve carried inside me for so many years has gone and I feel calmer and more relaxed than I ever remember feeling before. I’m still not sleeping or eating great but any improvement is a good sign. I still don’t feel like I can be around people but that’s not a problem right now, I still can’t write and my memory is crap but I am starting to feel a bit more positive about some things – that hopefully I will be able to start writing again soon, that I won’t always want to spend all my time alone. That maybe one day I’ll be able to take part in the memes again. I don’t feel right taking part when I can’t visit other blogs and comment because some of them upset me too much.

And that maybe one day I’ll like myself again.

There is no doubt that I have to make some changes in my life. I’m certainly not turning around and starting again though, that would be way too difficult but I am going to change direction even though I have no idea what to change, or how.

I’ve had a couple of appointments with the psychiatric team, well, one of them anyway. And I have a few more to go before being set a treatment plan, so I guess we’ll see how things go.

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How Many More?

Wicked Wednesday #33

Identity

Thanks to Rebel for picking my last Wicked Wednesday as one of her top three 🙂

Prompt

Identity…

In the (erotic) blogging community people frequently hide their real identities. This week we want to hear your thoughts on this…

I wasn’t actually going to write anything for this, currently my illness is making me feel I have no identity. But following events in Orlando is it any wonder many people who have a so –called alternative lifestyle continue to hide it?

I’m lucky, I live in probably one of the safest places in the world. Sure, there isn’t a whole hell of a lot to do here, but at the same time if people found out about this blog the worst I’d have to put up with would be gossip and my kids having the piss ripped out of them by their mates. Not pleasant and not something I’d want, which is why I’m anonymous, but still a hell of a lot better than what a lot of people have been through.

I’m not a religious person but I do try to keep sending out the good thoughts and vibes for people.

Unfortunately in politics money means more than people’s lives. I hope it changes.

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My Choice

Wicked Wednesday #32

choices

This week’s prompt – Choices…

Last week was about opportunities, whether you have taken them or not and whether you regret it or not. This week is about choices, and it can be seen as a continuance of last week. Why did you make a choice to take an opportunity or not? Or your choices can be about something totally different. Are there things you have to choose between? Maybe you have to choose between two jobs? Or between places to live? Or maybe it’s not things you have to choose between, but you have to choose between two people? Do you always have to choose between things or can you have both? Share your (sexy) posts about choices.

Meatloaf – You took the words right out of my mouth (hot summer night)

[Spoken:]
[Boy:] On a hot summer night,
would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses?
[Girl:] Will he offer me his mouth?
[Boy:] Yes.
[Girl:] Will he offer me his teeth?
[Boy:] Yes.
[Girl:] Will he offer me his jaws?
[Boy:] Yes.
[Girl:] Will he offer me his hunger?
[Boy:] Yes.
[Girl:] Again, will he offer me his hunger?
[Boy:] Yes!
[Girl:]And will he starve without me?
[Boy:] Yes!
[Girl:] And does he love me?
[Boy:] Yes.
[Girl:] Yes.
[Boy:] On a hot summer night,
would you offer your throat to the wolf with the red roses?
[Girl:] Yes.
[Boy:] I bet you say that to all the boys!

This is one of those things that keeps looping through my head, I’ve left all the words but the main ones I think about are ‘…would you offer your throat to the wolf…’

It’s something I’ve chosen to do over and over. And given the chance I’ll probably choose to do it again. I’ve crossed out the words that I have no interest in – don’t ever bring me roses, I hate them and I’m not interested in love – but offer me your teeth and your hunger, those I’ll take.

Wolf Sepia

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