The Last Post

Journey’s End?

For now, maybe for good. For this blog at least.

Cherry is dead, long live the hag!

I have finally found some sort of peace, some sort of place inside where I can maintain my sanity.

It has meant muting 90% of my kinky Twitter feed, it has meant I no longer, or very rarely, visit blogs, it has meant I no longer take part in memes. I thought I had finally found a place but now, yet again, I feel like I’m on the outside.

I tend to avoid conversations with people online, I don’t write any more, or take photos.

Some days I can take seeing stuff online, but most days everything just makes me feel like shit. And I hate it.

I’ve always had my fantasies, written stories, read and watched filth, masturbated. But now I have no desire to do any of it. I did more than I thought I would ever do and I wish I hadn’t because then I at least would still have had something.

The thought now of someone touching me, of my submitting, leaves me cold. And I don’t know if I’ll be able to get past it. Getting to know someone else, trusting them? Not bloody likely.

I won’t say never, but I’m done looking. I think you can get to a stage where enough is enough and at this point in my life I feel too old, too tired, too broken to even think about it.

I will still be on Twitter though because I’d be lost without it.

Not all those who wander are lost

Sinful Sunday #52

As it’s the first Sunday of the month it’s prompt week. This month’s prompt is Minimalist, I don’t know if this qualifies or not but I want to go back to having fun here, everything has become far too serious.

From the ashes a fire shall be woken,
A light from the shadows shall spring;   (Tolkien – The Riddle of Strider)

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More Sinful Sunday here.

Sinful Sunday

Un-feel

Friday Flash #10 and Masturbation Monday #25

Friday Flash Prompt #11 Happy New Year

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Masturbation Monday Prompt Week 123

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A new year, a new start.

At least that what I told myself.

But I could travel the world,

New York, London, Paris,

and never escape.

I let you inside my head and now I can’t get rid of you.

I wish I could un-feel,

the touch of your fingers on my skin.

I wish I could un-remember,

the feel of your hands on my body.

I wish I didn’t think about you holding me every night I go to sleep.

I wish I didn’t think about you fucking me every morning.

I don’t want the snapshots and flashbacks in my head.

A flurry of images.

Bodies, sweat, saliva and semen,

Mouths and hands,

cock and cunt,

tits and arse

I don’t want my body remembering,

how it felt,

to kneel for you,

to submit to you,

to surrender to you.

To willingly give you,

whatever you wanted.

To willingly take,

whatever you chose to give.

But I let you inside my head…

More Friday Flash here.

And more Masturbation Monday here.

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It’s the 300th Sinful Sunday this week! Congrats to Molly 😀

Sinful Sunday #51

Sometimes, people with depression or other mental health issues, say they feel as if they are on the outside looking in.

I think that’s looking at the problem the wrong way around.

I’ve been thinking about this feeling of disconnect, separateness, and for me I actually feel as if I’m in a bubble, or a goldfish bowl. Life goes on around me, I can see it, but I’m not part of it. I can’t hear, feel or touch it, except through the glass. Nothing feels right, my world becomes smaller and smaller, my life shrinks and I curl in on myself until I feel like I’m going to disappear.

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More Sinful Sunday here.

Sinful Sunday

Nollaig na mBan*

Boobday #54

*Gaelic for Women’s Christmas. Also known as Little Christmas.

January 6th is traditionally the day the woman of the house would get a day off from all her hard work over the Christmas period.

I’ve been a lazy bitch but here are some festive boobs 😀

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More Boobday here.

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