Un-feel

Friday Flash #10 and Masturbation Monday #25

Friday Flash Prompt #11 Happy New Year

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Masturbation Monday Prompt Week 123

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A new year, a new start.

At least that what I told myself.

But I could travel the world,

New York, London, Paris,

and never escape.

I let you inside my head and now I can’t get rid of you.

I wish I could un-feel,

the touch of your fingers on my skin.

I wish I could un-remember,

the feel of your hands on my body.

I wish I didn’t think about you holding me every night I go to sleep.

I wish I didn’t think about you fucking me every morning.

I don’t want the snapshots and flashbacks in my head.

A flurry of images.

Bodies, sweat, saliva and semen,

Mouths and hands,

cock and cunt,

tits and arse

I don’t want my body remembering,

how it felt,

to kneel for you,

to submit to you,

to surrender to you.

To willingly give you,

whatever you wanted.

To willingly take,

whatever you chose to give.

But I let you inside my head…

More Friday Flash here.

And more Masturbation Monday here.

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Stupidity

The guilt and anger at myself builds over the space of a few days, after a week of feeling good, slowly the bad thoughts and feelings creep back in.

I’ve only myself to blame, I let you in, I was the one who couldn’t refuse you when you found a gap in the wall.

And slowly, stone by stone, I let you further inside, into my mind, into my heart.

Now I don’t know if there’s enough left to rebuild the wall.

Friends say ‘You’ll meet someone else’, and I look around me and ask them ‘Where?’ They have no answer.

I really wasn’t going to write about you again, I thought maybe this time…but no, here you come again creeping into my thoughts.

I just wonder how long?

How long until thoughts of you are a rare, fleeting occurrence?

How long until I can forgive myself for being so stupid again?

How long until the need goes away?

How long until the wall is fully rebuilt?

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clamp

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Afterthought

You say you think about me a lot.

First thing in the morning or last thing at night?

Or am I just an afterthought?

Do I invade your every waking moment,

or disturb your sleep as you do mine?

Or am I just an afterthought?

I don’t need you to quantify,

only to qualify.

Although I wonder,

now I can finally think past you.

Will you become just an afterthought?

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Myriad

Wicked Wednesday #40

slutfest

Prompt

Inspiration for this prompt come from the open and honest way of writing by M of the blog Cammies on floor, during and after the breakup with her husband. Many who read that must have thought of their own break-ups, their own slutfests, their own way of dealing with the heartbreak. Come on, share yours with the world.

A slutfest would be good

right about now.

To spend hours and days

fucking you out of my head.

To have someone else

run their hands

over my body.

A new mouth to kiss and bite.

A myriad of new bodies

to explore.

Each one different

to you.

New hands

new mouths

new cocks.

Anything.

To be able to leave you behind.

A series of one night stands

to be the slut

that I know I am.

Hands between my thighs

searching between the folds

to find the wetness within.

Slick fingers stroking my clit

swollen with need.

Sliding inside me

to banish you.

To be fucked

again and again

night after night

one after the other

cock after cock

until there is nothing left.

My mind empty and quiet.

I wish.

forgetting

More Wicked Wednesday here.

My Obsession

Friday Flash #9 and Masturbation Monday #24

It’s been a while since I flashed the lovely Leonora 🙂

This the prompt for October.

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Love is love, is lust, is obsession,

intertwined.

Strength and weakness

combine,

to take

what is given freely.

Skin on skin,

rough hands,

soft lips,

hard cock.

The rope,

that twists and binds,

the belt,

that bites and stings.

I fall in love,

a little bit more,

every time.

 

More Friday Flash here.

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and more Masturbation Monday here.

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Get out of my head!

Masturbation Monday #23

 

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I know it’s been a while since I last took part, four months, I checked. I didn’t know it had been that long. I’ve had some problems finishing things for various reasons, but here you go. I don’t think is great, but it’s finished. (I really need a rebound fuck)

More random shite from my brain

You need to do this

I can’t

Yes you can, just bloody do it!

It scares me, I can’t

The only way to stop being scared is to do it

But I’ve tried and it doesn’t work. All I end up with is disjointed sentences, the thoughts scatter, the words hide.

You have to keep trying

I know.

The thoughts won’t leave me, I can’t settle to anything, they always interrupt, invade, take over, until my mind is filled, the pain and darkness return and I’m lost again.

Thoughts of what was, the pain of loss, the darkness of being alone.

Until I lie down and close my eyes, when something like muscle memory kicks in,

as I close my eyes, feel what was,

strong arms keeping me safe, holding me together,

skin against skin, our bodies an almost perfect fit,

hands stroking, fingers exploring, twisting, pinching,

my wrists held together above my head,

sighs and moans turn to mewls and gasps,

as the flashes of pain make me wet,

my clit longing for his touch,

on my back, a hand round my throat,

half-heard, half-forgotten words,

whispers in my ear,

fucktoy, slut, mine,

as I feel his cock inside me,

slow, deliberate strokes,

as he tells me what he wants to see,

me, used, fucked, slapped, spanked,

‘you want it’

‘no, please, fuck’

his weight holding me down,

‘slut’

‘yes’

‘fucking dirty whore’

‘yes’

‘my dirty, little whore’

‘yours’

 

More Masturbation Monday here.

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Just a quick post

Wicked Wednesday #37

I know I said I wouldn’t be around much but we all know how well that works for me 😀 I’ve an empty house, everyone’s back to school and I need something to do.

As it’s September 1st, and I want to keep up with ‘Self Love September’ I thought this would fit in quite nicely with this week’s Wicked Wednesday prompt (I know it’s Thursday) which is –

diary

Dear Diary…

Did you ever have a diary to which you told all your secrets? Or maybe you still have a diary? Share something sexy from your diary or share a sexy story with the prompt ‘Dear Diary’.

I’ve always tried keeping a diary but I’ve never done more than fill in a couple of pages before losing interest. I never seemed to have much to write about and it was more of an excuse to buy pretty notebooks.

Since I did a short course on writing a couple of years ago I’ve finally managed to get the habit. I now have notebooks for several different things – personal, quotes, ideas, stories etc. – and what better reason for starting another one than learning to love myself. This not just about how I look, this is about the whole package. Trying to figure out why I feel the way I do about the things that I don’t understand about myself, and my whole outlook on pretty much everything that’s got me to this point in my life.

I’ve already found that writing out my thoughts has helped me figure out several things about me, so I hope that by keeping a journal for the month while I read lots of new-agey self-help stuff will get me a little way further on my journey to liking me.

I hope to post a few times to let you know how I’m getting on, and also share any sites that I find interesting or useful.

Notebook

These are my notebooks of choice, this one still in its wrapper. 192 pages of creamy 120gsm loveliness. An absolute bargain at €4.

More Wicked Wednesday here.

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